September 2, 2011

Me Time vs. Creative Time

Everyone female on the planet remembers the movie "The Notebook" right?  I think I saw it at the theatre at least 3 times, and was in line to buy the movie when it came out on DVD.  That movie was life chaning for me, and helped me realize that I had ignored myself, and my creativity for MUCH too long.

The painting scene (captured below) hit me so hard, I was a sobbing idiot in the theater when I saw it for the first time.  I had become so busy being someone that I though I was supposed to me, and stopped listening to myself, and what I truly wanted to be, and do with my life.

I NEED to be creative.  Whether it's crocheting a granny square blanket, or surfing the net for new artwork for our home.  It is a part of me, and I truly NEED that in my life.

This fact really hit me hard - again - last night.  My daughter was staying overnight at her grandparents house, since our sitter was on vacation for a couple days, and we still had to work - my hubby was at softball, and for the first time in likely at LEAST a year, I had the entire house to myself.  And not just for 10 or 15 minutes.  But 4 entire hours!  You have NO idea how happy I was to have this time to myself.   Finally some ME time.  Yet, I did nothing.  Nothing but sit my butt on the sofa, watching HGTV, and catching up on the latest antics on Jersey Shore.

Here I was looking forward to some time alone, yet I felt like I had totally wasted it watching trash TV.  I felt guilty.  Guilty that I wasn't doing the one thing that I kicked myself for so many years ago.  I should of at least picked up my crochet and did some more work on a blanket i'm working on for my daughter's big girl bed.  Or I could have worked on some blog posts.  Or I could have started that mood board I've been meaning to start.

But I didn't.  I sat on my butt, and watched the tube instead, where all I did was miss my kid.


What's the point of me time, if you don't use that me time constructively?  So, i've made myself a promise, to NOT do that again.  It made me realize that sure I need my me time, but I need my creative time MORE.  So, it's come time to make conscious effort to start taking that creative time.  Even if it's only 30 minutes a day.  It's something.  And i'll feel better when that rare 3-4 hour window comes along again for me to JUST DO NOTHING.

Do you take me time?  How to you spend it?  Doing something creative?  Doing nothing like I did last night?  Or do you do something else?

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